Sep10

It’s the Small Things

by Heather Whaling

My sister-in-law is that person who sends a card for every holiday. Yes, a card. In the mail. With a stamp. And, I’m serious when I say *every* holiday — not just Christmas and Thanksgiving … but Halloween, St. Patrick’s Day and everything in between. She always takes a few minutes to write a personal note telling us what’s going on in their lives and asking about ours. Every time I get a card from her, I know she’s thinking about us. I love it! And, it’s a good reminder that those little gestures are the ones that mean the most.

Don’t you think that rule applies to your online life as well as your offline world? As you work on building and nurturing your community, it’s still the small things that matter, right? Two quick examples:

Last week, Jason Falls sent out his first Social Media Explorer e-newsletter. (Side note: If you’re not a subscriber, march on over to his blog right now and sign up!) I loved the tone, the links to other blogs, the content — pretty much everything about it. So, I tweeted the link to the e-newsletter. A few people retweeted it. Apparently, a lot of people opened the link. So, Jason shot me a quick message just to thank me for sharing his newsletter with my network. I thought that was fantastic. Jason’s a busy guy — he didn’t have to thank me for doing anything for him. But, he did. And that meant a lot to me. Going forward, I’ll be that much more likely to lend a hand to him if I can or share his blog posts with my network. He’s a good guy and took a minute to show some appreciation.

Likewise, Chris Brogan — who is crazy busy promoting his book, answering tweets from an insane amount of people and still working the day job — responded to an email my mom sent him after she finished Trust Agents. She sent him a note just to tell him that she enjoyed his book. That’s it. Well, he responded to her email, thanking her for the feedback. Seriously?!? Chris Brogan, who already had sold my mom the book, still took the time to answer this email. Stop for a minute and think about how many emails he receives. My mom was really impressed by his gesture.

One last thought: This applies to businesses as well as individuals. What are you doing to say thanks and let people know you appreciate them? I told you about Jason and Chris. Who have you seen adding that personal touch?

Tagged as: Chris Brogan, Community building, Jason Falls

  • I agree with you 100% - the small things in life really make the biggest impact.

    One small thank you gesture that stands out in my mind is from Rachel Esterline (@rachelesterline). She spent about a half day job shadowing me and a few of my colleagues at the PR agency where I work. Not only did she send me a hand-written thank you card after the job shadow, but she also sent me a Christmas card a few months later thanking me again for my time and expressing that she hoped to stay in contact. I was touched that she thought to send me a Christmas card, and it really made her stand out in my book!
  • The small things make a massive difference for sure. Think of the moon landing speech: "One small step for man, one giant leap for mankind", or the lone student facing down the tanks in Tinhamen Square (probably spelled wrong!!). It just took one small event or act to help change the course of the world.

    Every thing we do means something; whether it's a phone call, a tweet, an email or even just a smile at a stranger on the train. Our lives are full of dull grey areas; it's nice to light them up and it doesn't cost a penny.

    Thanks for this post and being you, Heather - always a pleasure. :)



  • heatherwhaling
    Thanks for joining the "We Heart Danny" party. :) And, more importantly, thanks for being *you.*
  • saralizdavidson
    Love this post! It is so unbelievably true how a small thank you or even recognition from someone can make you feel. I'm a 20-something in the PR/marketing business, so when I first joined Twitter, I began following all of the "bigwigs" in the industry. And for anyone who followed me back, I sent a message thanking them and letting them know I was excited to follow/connect with them---really not expecting to hear anything back. (After all, we all know we've sent many messages or responded to tweets with no response). Danny Brown (@DannyBrown) sent me this personal message:

    DannyBrown: Hi Sara - you're welcome, and your bio certainly piqued my interest - great collection of interests there, look forward to hearing from u :)

    Knowing how special that short message made me feel, ever since I’ve tried to do the same thing. I think it’s a testament to Danny’s character and philosophy. Here’s another example of a short conversation we had after he posted something:

    DannyBrown: Here's an idea. For each new follower you connect to, RT something you like from them to share with your existing friends

    saradavidson: @DannyBrown I like that idea!

    DannyBrown: @saradavidson Cool, Sara - it's nice to be nice and doesn't cost a penny ;-)

    saradavidson: @DannyBrown I'm definitely going to try it! Thx for the idea, Danny!

    DannyBrown: @saradavidson More than welcome Sara, and thank YOU for running with it :)

    So I tried the idea – and have received thanks from a lot of my new followers. This same thing has happened with a log of Gen-Y folks I began connecting with, such as @mattwilsontv, @jaredotoole and @elysa. Whenever I’ve retweeted their blog posts, I’ve always received a thanks from them---every time. Each of their blogs are now on my “must read” in my Google reader each day.
  • Aww, thanks Sara - so glad we hooked up and continued the conversation as well. And I hear you - some of the friendliest folk around at the minute seem to be coming from the Gen Y space. Us oldies can learn a few things yet ;-)
  • heatherwhaling
    Sara, thanks so much for giving us this example. That's why we all love Danny! :)

    Sasha, I totally hear you when you say that we as communicators forget to communicate sometimes. We were just talking about that the other day in my office. We're constantly on the phone or emailing people or interacting with people as part of our jobs -- it's easy to let the "personal touch" type communication slip through the cracks.

    You said it better than I did: "That's the power of communication, that's the power of engagement, that's the power of contact." Couldn't agree more!
  • I totally agree with Sara. I've had a lot of the same experiences with some of the people mentioned and who have commented on this post.

    Engagement is so amazing and I think sometimes we forget how really great it is. And as communications people -- we communicate, but we don't realize that the rest of the world isn't like us...all the time.

    And us, ourselves, sometimes forget to "communicate" -- but it's amazing how much of an impact a small note can mean to someone else.

    That's the power of communication, that's the power of engagement, that's the power of contact.

    Love the post Heather! :)
  • trishskram
    Great post, Heather! Personal cards, emails, tweets, Facebook messages to the wonderful people in your life is just a nice thing to do and if that attitude comes naturally to you, you will certainly be someone who can connect with just about anyone. No matter how busy you get, if you can make an effort to pull away from the grind and personalize with someone -- you'll really connect with people and learn something new every day! @trishskram
  • heatherwhaling
    You're exactly right. No matter how busy we get, just taking a minute to pull back and say "hello" or "thank you" really goes a long way. Thanks so much for reading and sharing!
  • laurenfernandez
    I come from a family where we send cards for everything.... I think I even got a card when I won the Citizen Award in 5th grade. Personal touches tell a person you care - like hey, I spent time thinking of you, picking out this card, and writing to you - hand written has a much more personal feel than an e-mail.

    Personal touches I like - Amy Mengel will always DM me if I'm having a bad day, to see if I'm ok. Arik Hanson sends me encouraging stuff all the time, and will send out e-mails to people if I get a hit in PRDaily or Ragan. He's definitely a considerate one! It's the little things.
  • Amy rocks - even when on the cocktails! ;-)
  • Tali Hylen
    Thanks for this post! I am such a firm believer in taking the time for personalization. While many of my friends and associates deem thank you cards, holiday cards, and small gestures and gifts unnecessary, I still believe in the power of just doing something to be nice. It's all about karma baby!
    It's not always about YOU. And you're never too busy to do what's right.
    Thanks!
  • heatherwhaling
    Hi Tali, thanks for reading and for the comment. I'm with you. We're all so accustomed to sending and receiving messages via email or tweet or Facebook that we forget how nice it feels when someone takes the time to write a note by hand. Hooray for good karma!!
  • valeriesimon
    I read a book many years ago by Terrie Williams, President of the Terry Williams agency, called "The Personal Touch," and your post reminds me why it has a special spot on my bookshelf. I love the examples you shared of Chris & Jason, but I'm not suprised. We preach that social media is about conversations and one on one connections, and the sharp folks understand the power of a one on one connections. I love that Lauren Fernandez takes pride in sending hand written thank you notes. That Sarah Evans takes time to respond to replies and DM's from newbies, and doesn't hesitate to share her warmth and knowledge. Your right. It makes a difference. I love how Danny Brown always takes the time to respond to comments on his blog... he just conducts every conversation, every tweet with such generousity, style and class. It really is about the small things... how you conduct yourself each day. I try to make an effort to thank the (many) people who teach me each day and this post is a good reminder. Thanks Heather ;)
  • heatherwhaling
    Valerie, I've never heard of that book. I may have to add it to my reading list!
  • Hey there Valerie, thank you! Though I'm pretty sure if you go through my history there are more than a few examples where style and class were forgotten... ;-)

    I think the thing with the comments is that people have taken the time out of their day not once, but twice - once to read the post, and once more to comment. The very least I can do is be appreciative of that and talk back - imagine it offline where someone said "Hi" to you twice and you ignored them?

    There will be times when maybe a comment doesn't "need" a follow-up, but if it's someone new to the blog, I will always try and make them feel welcome. It's like Heather and you mention - it's not a big thing but I think it can mean a lot.
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